60+ Life Hacks for Seniors Part One

Article by Dr. Michael Tobin

How to Get Smarter, Healthier, and Happier, and Live the Premium Lifestyle You Deserve

Today, I decided to break the rules.  It’s one of the prerogatives of being a Premium – not needing to be a good boy.

I’m going to start with a poetry slam on the experience of aging. It has nothing to do with the title of this blog. It’s just that a half hour ago someone sent me this Dr. Zeus rip-off on the ills of aging and it pissed me off. So much so that I felt compelled to slam his poem. (I’m convinced the author is a “he” – something about the peeing and screwing).

So, first the self-pity ditty on aging, and then my rendition.

Bear with me. After I get this off my chest we’ll get into 60 + Life Hacks.

I cannot see
I cannot pee
I cannot chew
I cannot screw

Oh my god, what can I do?

My memory shrinks
My hearing stinks
No sense of smell
I look like hell

My mood is bad – can you tell?

My body’s drooping
Have trouble pooping
The Golden Years
Have come at last
The Golden Years
Can kiss my ass

Well, to whoever wrote this, you can kiss my well-developed gluteus maximus muscles. Know this, you whiny, self-hating old fart, the Golden Years, for many of us, are the best, most productive, and happiest time of our life.

Here’s our song:

On Being a Premium

We can pee

We can see

We can move

We can groove

Unlike you, we know what to do

Young at heart

Not a self-hating old fart

Experience is our teacher

Wisdom is our preacher

Our attitude is positive – isn’t it obvious

We know how to smile

Still can walk a mile

We’ve reached the stage

That this is our age:

I’m not 72; I’m 22 with 50 years of experience!!!!

Having gotten that off my chest, here’s 60+ reasons to make you smarter, healthier, and happier. It’s long – so long, in fact, that there’s 2 parts. The rule in blogging is no more than 2 pages and dumb it down to a third-grade level. Screw that! Premiums, unlike hyper active Millennials, know how to read.

Health and Premium Fitness

  1. Think of your body like it’s your kid. Cherish it, protect it, and challenge it to grow. Feed it well, discipline it, and love it unconditionally. And never, never outsource your body to the medical profession. Take responsibility for your health. Read, be informed, ask questions, and get answers. It’s your body; you owe it to yourself.
  2. Outsmart gravity. Every time you see someone bent over remind yourself to stand up straight (no, don’t correct THEM – correct yourself!), keep your eyes focused forward, shoulders back and relaxed. Old people unconsciously surrender to gravity; Premiums remain aware and conscious.
  3. It’s all in the core. If you’re a regular exerciser you probably know what I’m talking about. Your strength, posture, and energy come from those muscles deep in your midsection. Try these exercises.
  4. You were born to sweat. So, move, move, move. Walk, run, hike, climb, dance, bicycle, garden – just move. You’ll have plenty of time in the grave to do nothing.
  5. You know you can’t cheat sleep anymore. Cultivate good sleep habits. Go to bed at the same time and get up at the same time. If you have trouble with insomnia, try this.
  6. Same goes with food, can’t cheat too much or you pay the price: heartburn, weight gain, sluggish, bloated. Don’t have to tell you what you already know.  Here’s the drill: no processed carbs, no sugar, easy on the alcohol, especially if your glucose levels are high. Healthy is never boring; what passes for tasty is usually salty, sweet, or fatty. Don’t be fooled by Fritos’ cool Super Bowl ads.
  7. Lift weights – it’s essential for fat burning, strength, bone density, and energy. Check out this resource.
  8. Take supplements. You probably need extra Vitamin D, Omega 3, calcium, magnesium, etc. Here’s a good resource to figure out what to take.
  9. Challenge yourself physically. Be satisfied (not content) with whatever you do, but if you can, strive to do a bit more. Happiness is a function of constant growth and improvement.
  10. Here’s a test for the guys which I got from my urologist. (Yes, we all have urologists these days. Deal with it.) Stand about a foot from the toilet, imagine bull’s eye is the center of the bowl and see if you can hit the target. If so, you’re fine. If you consistently pee on your shoes, make an immediate appointment with the urologist.
  11. Here’s how not to outsource your health to the medical profession: Doctors hate cholesterol and love to prescribe statins. Think twice. First of all, total cholesterol includes LDL’s and HDL’s. HDL’s are considered good cholesterol. Here’s how you know if you have a problem with cholesterol. Take the total cholesterol and divide it by the HDL’s. So, if your total cholesterol is 230, a number many doctors think is too high, but your HDL’s are 60, you’re in good shape. Why? 230/60 = 3.8. Any # below 4 is considered very good.
  12. Here’s how to deal with pain. I became adept at the first technique when I was dealing with extreme pain following surgery. It helped me to reduce the pain by at least 90%.
  13. Minimally, you’ll feel more relaxed. Very likely, it may change the quality of your life.  Download this app.
  14. When I was in (American army) basic training a million years ago, this is the message that was drilled into us: If you can’t run fast, run slow. If you can’t run slow, walk fast. If you can’t walk fast, walk slow. If you can’t walk slow, crawl on all fours. If you can’t crawl on all fours, then crawl on your belly. Never, never give up. No matter how slow you go, just go.
  15. Surround yourself with love and companionship. It correlates extremely high with longevity, health, and happiness. See this Ted Talk.
  16. In the end, it’s all in your head. Health is a function of mindset (more on that later). Think positively, cultivate gratitude, express love, and you’ll be happier and healthier than an angry and bitter 70-year-old who can knock off 100 pushups.


Yes, you’re still a parent. It doesn’t matter whether your children have wrinkles, gray hair, and 20-year-olds graduating from college, they still need you. Here are some tips to manage that relationship:

  1. Speak to your kids at least 3 times per week. Never stop being curious, supportive, and encouraging, and never, never underestimate your importance to them.
  2. If you have the means and their financial needs are legitimate, then be generous.
  3. Great parenting = great modeling. Continue to be an example of what it means to live a quality life. The best definition I heard for greatness is this: when the people who know you the best, respect you the most.
  4. Be careful with advice, especially when it’s unsolicited. Before giving a suggestion to your child, make sure he or she first opts in. Here’s the script: You:  Are you open to a suggestion? Child: Sure. THEN you offer advice; not before.
  5. Adult children are especially sensitive about their kids, their spouses, and the chaos in their homes. Be careful before commenting on any of the above. See #20 above about when to comment and when not to comment.
  6. Being a parent doesn’t mean never having to say no. Don’t let guilt control you. You have a right to pursue your own life.
  7. If you can afford it, there’s nothing quite as wonderful, chaotic, and fun as a family vacation with the whole clan. It solidifies bonds and creates memories.
  8. As the matriarch and patriarch of your family, you are the guardians and protectors of those sacred family norms of cooperation, consideration, and kindness. Your attitude and behavior have a lot to do with the preservation of those positive family values.
  9. Assuming you did a pretty good job of raising your children, they’re probably pretty smart and have a lot of good suggestions for you as well. Allow yourself to learn from them. My children continue to be my most trusted teachers and role models.
  10. Whenever you’re feeling exasperated by your children, remember how much sweeter it is to have this problem than the emptiness of having no children and no challenges.

Don’t worry – the list will continue! Here’s what I’ll cover in Part II:  The Premium Mindset, grandparenting, lifestyle, retirement, and finances. So, stay tuned and when done, please add your suggestions on how to be smarter, happier, and healthier.

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